hap·pi·ness

Nine letters, more than what it is seen. I am making the choice to free myself, and rid myself of the burdens or boulders of today, and yesterday. Nine letters, I’ll try to simplify what this word, idea, and way of life is into the five of six segments. Five of the six will come from Maslow’s hierarchy of needs. I’ll leave a diagram for reference:

Diagram

Starting with the first segment, Physiological needs are essential to happiness. It is the foundation and necessary start to a better way of life. Nourishment is essential to everyday life. Rest, warmth and water; the body is made up of about 60% of water, this may be surprising but even the bones are watery. The next part of the hierarchy is apart of the basic needs, which is safety needs. A sense of security is significant to continue or even start life. These are simple but crucial ideas that tie into a bigger picture.

Psychological needs take up the next two pieces of Maslow’s hierarchy. Relationships and need for love are placed above the physiological needs, because it is possible to have one and not the other (not saying that it is wise, or a healthy lifestyle…). Belongingness and love needs can go anywhere from respect from a stranger, fitting in at work or school, and/or a place one can be themselves. This could be in reference to a group or a particular person, or being that makes one feel sane. In my eighteen years of living and loving, I’ve noticed that many people who suffer from the absences of these needs are either spiritual-less, or have a spotty family. I won’t get into spirituality too much, but it is something that does help. Please DO NOT think I am going to push down my beliefs down your throats, but merely inform today’s public on my beliefs, and what I hold true. Spirituality in my experience did help fill, and is still a constant battle to fill that hole in my life. I will say I try to be more spiritually in-tune, rather than boasting around my Christian denomination. But there is just a reassurance knowing that you are working for something that is bigger than yourself. Bigger than your family, and even bigger than your neighbor; doing the right thing may not always feel right, and people like to live for themselves, but the end reward in my opinion is self-reflection on self impact to the world. I pose the question constantly, Did they really need to hear that? Why do they care so much about what I think? Do I honestly matter? Who even cares? All of these questions float around me when I am still trying to determine the meaning of life from my very own perspective. I want to apologize for going off on a tangent!

Back to relationships and friendships, no one likes fluff when it comes to human interaction; unless your head is in the gutter, or maybe you are a gluttonous when it comes to light textures. Either way, I can personally say that I don’t just randomly talk to someone. There is always a reason for the spontaneity, whether it be present or revealed at a later date. If I am to speak or make the first step into creating a genuine -ship of some kind, it is either because I feel I can impact them, or maybe I feel that there is a lesson to be taught. I’ll use Danni and I as an example, two genuine and quirky girls who are stupid similar, but contrasts each other in various ways. Neither dependent upon the other, but a true -ship, where each is gaining something from each shared experience. A relationship, is a relationship, is a relationship, and love is love (please DO NOT TAKE THAT OUT OF CONTEXT) in a relationship. I LOVE my friend, and we have reached a level of friendship that I can bombastically say is intimate. Was it easy to get to this level? Heck no! But it is worth it for the right ones, and one will never know until they have been hurt, doubted and failed. All of the above, I can say I have felt in spirituality and in day to day associates, and people I use to call my friends. There are people who will disagree and state that they are able to be alone, and do not need that intimacy whether it be platonic or more. LIES! Nine times out of ten, those are your type [Insert Letter Here] personalities. I do not encourage dependencies, unless you are still in the adolescent stage, but healthy relationships are a key to finding a better version of yourself. If that’s through the modern church so be it. If it is through your high school peers, so be it. Even if it is just you and your mental self getting centered or finding that equilibrium (spirituality talk again) please do it, it is worth it in this short life trying to make each day last and count.

---

The second fold to the psychological need is a step above, and is the esteem needs. This in itself may need its own chart, blob, etc. This fold is one I know I struggle with time and time again, and that is just acceptance of one’s accomplishments. Plain and simple way to explain this is “LOVE YOURSELF, EXPRESS YOURSELF”, or maybe even “Treat-yo-self” the idea that you did something that deserves your own recognition and reward. I will repeat that it is plain and simple, but harder done than it is said. Even if you cannot, and I mean by any circumstances accept your hard work, when someone else does, be appreciative even if you do not see it. I will not support lying, but LIE to yourself and believe the good until you feel sufficient to tell yourself the wholehearted truth of your greatness. And one day, not tonight or tomorrow, but one day you’ll be okay with who you are,and what you produce, and you’ll be over joyed of your very results.

The last tier in Maslow’s triangle is Self-Actualization. No! this is not an okay for the “Debbie Downers”of life to say they suck and they always will at life, but this is an idea, and way of life that less than two percent of people will experience. If one can reach this level, Maslow considers this to be the all high. I do not like to reference people I have never met, but there is a truth in this theory. This is the last tier, but the sixth one I’ve mentioned early on will bring this full circle. Self-Actualization, when one reaches their full potential in all aspects. Holding nothing back whether it be in the Arts or everyday thinking, this one is applying themselves in the best way they know to get maximum results. This is a great idea, but I feel Maslow did not account for the different genders, and how each gender works, more than likely he didn’t account for hormones, morons, idiots, family members, education, the daily joker, caloric intake. None of these seem to be  present in my opinion, this could  be my lack of further research and or ignorance. I regardless, it is said to be possible.

Before I state the last tier know that everything in life has a contradiction and that I will more than likely present them to you; the viewers. The very last thing but the most important is Living. Know who your living for, why you live, and if you don’t know why find someone positive to assist you on your journey. But change, and happiness is nice when said and done, until there needs to be proof. Be yourself always DON’T LET ANYONE walk over you, be quiet, be courageous, be yourself, be someone else if it makes you feel good. But please do what makes you happy or gives you the slight excitement because, like my mother says “Time doesn’t wait, and you don’t get smaller as the days pass you!” Seize the day, year, your joy and happiness, and everything else in between, because when you die, you die alone. So go through the motions and make them so, so that tomorrow you’ll have no regret and you won’t be afraid to show!

Great year to you all and a Good Morning, Night, and Evening to you all wherever you may be. —Adonighel J.

---

---